Why does it feel like self-growth is WORK?
Self-growth and expansion don’t have to be this big event, sudden revelation, or huge breakthrough.
Often the highs or lows in your life are catalysts, but the life change that’s going to transform you to a higher level of consciousness is the change that comes with staying the course and living life every day.
Instant gratification is a huge catalyst and our modern life is set up to trigger instantly, all the time. I’m sure you all know what I’m talking about.
Every time you act on an impulse and get instant gratification, you feel a rush of curiosity and satisfaction- then it’s gone. Off to look for next thing.
What happens in between the highs and the lows?
Not to make you feel bad, but let’s stay in the lows for a moment. Think about all the gym memberships (and the new gym clothes!) you bought and rarely use, the courses you bought and never finished, or the nutrition plan that was going to make all the difference…
So, what’s the trick to make it stick this time? Skip the instant gratification and go right to the source of the motivation and the energy to change: YOU.
I tried everything possible to stick to my original well-thought-out plan that I had in my mind for what I thought I needed.
I went through the highs and the lows of change. All the starts and the stops. And only to start again… and again… exhausting, to say the least.
It wasn’t until I aligned with the flow of what truly mattered to me that change happened naturally.
What truly matters to you?
You may think you know what matters to you. Most of the time we think it’s something outside us that matters the most- a good job, a comfortable home, that new handbag to show off or to lose some weight.
I’d like to challenge you to go much deeper than that… What TRULY matters to you?
What are your values, what are your non-negotiables?
Have your must-haves changed over time? Are they still the same? Why?
How true is it that you still value what was important to you growing up? Likely, not all things that you were conditioned to believe as important are important to you today. It’s time to shake things up and pull out what you TRULY value today.
For example, today I value deep, truth-seeking, soul transformational conversation with others. This led me to coaching and wanting to help others to find more balance and see their lives in a new light.
Wow! THAT single insight accelerated the entire change for me.
I wasn’t aware that this really mattered to me and a couple of years ago- I was too busy to find out.
If you want support in finding out what truly matters to you and what your values are today, book a mini session with me to find out.
Once I started to align with this flow of natural evolution I didn’t have to work for the change, it just kept happening and I was totally in for the ride.
I know now in my heart that I’d rather be feeling free, connected, inspired, calm and generous and that’s where I start every day’s intention.
You may tell yourself: “I am just too busy to stay with it all.”
We were born to be real, not perfect.
When you’re not consistent you may want something that doesn’t truly matter to you anymore.
The fear of your life being perfect is keeping you from continuing. That fear takes expression as an unreachable expectation on yourself.
I am not perfect, I fall off the bandwagon and get frustrated most days about something. The difference now is that I’ll catch myself when I’m feeling overwhelmed and on autopilot telling myself that I can’t do it.
So what’s the action for self growth?
What you do may look completely different to you, but it’s not WHAT you do to stay the course that matters, it’s THAT you do it that matters!
Using tools that remind you about who you truly are helps you to come back to that inner motivation, shifting your energy from hopeless to hopeful in an instant.
To stay the course you’ll need to be gently reminded every day about who you truly are.
The key is not to make this reminder so rigid it feels like one more thing to do on your to-do list, rather give yourself freedom and options so your creativity is guiding you instead of following a boxed-in rule with no meaning.
Small, realistic actions anchored in what truly matters to you are key to keeping it real and relevant to what’s happening today.
Below are 3 powerful self-growth tools that you’ll use to help you stay the course:
1. Shake Up Your Morning Routine for Good.
Start the day off in tune with your true self instead of on the fly and you’ll notice the stress fall off your shoulders.
As you can imagine, this is the backbone for infinite well-being. The long-term practice you create in the morning is just for YOU.
Does your morning look something like this: “Alarm goes off, you pick up your phone and scroll through work emails and social media, writing down a couple of to-do’s for work, then heading into the bathroom and right into the shower and the day is off to a rush, already feeling stressed”?
Here is how you can create a whole new vibe.
There is no right or wrong here, but your guidepost when changing things up here would be to create your favorite “non-negotiable time with yourself”-type of feeling.
Think about what you would do to keep you in tune with yourself for the very first 15 minutes of your day…
4 Easy Morning Steps in 15 Minutes:
- Change your alarm to music.
- First thing (no checking emails) settle in for a 10min meditation (this is key).
- Spend 5 minuets journaling right after meditation.
- End you journaling with writing out your intention for the day.
You may say “I don’t have any time in the morning for all of this!” …you do. Even if you have young kids at home that wake up early, there is nothing more important for you than to set your day off right.
Learn more about creating morning routines in this blog post “The Unspoken Power of a Morning Routine You LOVE!” Today, set your alarm to 15 minutes earlier than normal for the next 21 days. When you start your day by tuning into yourself, you don’t want to start any other way. If you only pick one tool to start with, this is the one.
2. Get a Boost of Inspiration by Returning to Your Happy Space.
Receiving support and encouragement from others to stay on track is great, but the most powerful support comes from within yourself.
Sometimes you’ll need to get reminded and inspired so set up a special happy space within your home. This will provide a great inspiration boost!
Gather reminders of your importance, your true self and your goals in your happy space.
I recommend limiting pictures of others (including your family members) because they may divert your attention from the reason you wanted to visit your happy space.
The happy space is for YOU only, because all other hours of the day you are focusing on others and when you visit this space you surround yourself with reminders of your soul and how you want to feel.
Use the below tips to come up with items to put in your happy space:
- Select an item that has personal value to you.
- Identify how you want to feel.
- Infuse that feeling into the item by holding it in your hand, closing your eyes, and invoking the feeling.
- Hold the item for at least 30 seconds as you infuse the item with your desired feeling.
- Place the item in your Happy Space area.
- Go back to this item at times you want to go back to that feeling again.
You can create your little happy space at work as well!
3. Wear an Intention Reminder to avoid a Detour from Self-Growth.
Another powerful way to stay the course is to wear what I call an intention reminder bracelet. Basically, it’s a reminder directly to your soul!
Personally, I love wearing crystal bracelets because I can wear many at the same time and each of them has a different meaning to me.
I infuse the bracelets with each of my intentions and desires of what I’d like to create and how I’d like to feel.
By wearing the bracelet I remind myself every day. Thus, the intention stays close to me and gives me no reason to detour.
If you want to learn more, I wrote a blog post on intention reminders for your soul, read it here: “Better than a Health App: How to Stick with your Personal Goals Using a Soul Reminder”.
Examples of intention reminders are items such as bracelets, malas, rings or any object that is special and has meaning to you.
Try this approach today!
In the midst of everything, these tools will allow the rush you feel to transform into a sensation of rest.
Then, return to how you want to feel and act on it every time, again and again.
An important part of your self-growth path is to show yourself that YOU MATTER & YOU ARE IMPORTANT!
Resist backing down when fear show up and therefore ignoring your dreams and visions.
This is when all of these tools come in to support you! Use them and trust the transformational power of them.
Reminding yourself of your worth and what matters to you, means that you show yourself over and over again that you can be your own role model.
Seeing your reality for what it is and wanting to keep closing that gap.
Are you curious about your own path of self-growth? Explore the opportunity that is right in front of you. Here and now. Schedule a mini-session with me and let’s chat about your path.
Visit your happy space often, if only for a 3 min meditation to help you return to you.
If you believe it’s possible for you to make a conscious change focus. Understand that change can’t be done while your mind is somewhere else.
Allow everything that needs to fall into place, fall into place. Surrender.
Here is the opportunity – turn off the autopilot, step into self growth & return to feeling like YOU in your life again.
Why let yourself to go another week pushing yourself forward in the rat race?
Remind yourself that everyday is a fresh start.