Why is it so that self care tends to stay at the bottom of the to-do list? Let alone a morning routine?
When was the last time you promised yourself to start over with a new morning routine? “THIS week I’m going to…”
Do you often realize that your goal to start to put yourself first, and begin a nourishing self care practice, didn’t turn out the way you intended?
I think you already know the answer. You skipped a day, or two, or three…
Yes. you might think. “I know. That’s right. I skipped. Again.”
So, why is it so hard to stick to what we thought we would do and promised ourselves on day one?
The reasons can be many for allowing yourself to slip, to procrastinate.
One of the reasons is busy working women don’t put themselves first it is this “I feel guilty for putting myself first” attitude.
This is completely understandable because the more complex your life is with work, family, friends and a million responsibilities, the more we tend to not put ourselves in the front seat of our lives.
And when there is a clash between what you deep down know is right for you, and feeling yourself never getting to it, frustration with yourself sets in.
Personal growth does not go on sale.
There is no rebate when it comes to life’s lessons that you are assigned to learn. There is no quick wins when it comes to consistent self care.
We all have our reasons and our stories that we tell ourselves. And when we start to negotiate with ourselves important things start to fade out and the once so firm commitment is gone.
But one thing is for sure.
No consistency. No change.
So, how do we get consistent? How do we maintain a new practice and turn it into a new lifestyle? A lifestyle that is based on what YOU LOVE, what EXCITES YOU the most, and one you can maintain and look forward to doing.
I can tell you right now that your consistency is the answer. But before that comes self awareness.
Without self awareness of what you LOVE and what EXCITES you as an individual the consistency is going to fade out. You’re not going to be inspired after a while.
There is nothing else than consistency that’s going to get you what you want. You can try a new practice for a couple of days, you get the experience, and then once you stay consistent you get the lifestyle change and benefit you want.
With consistency you can relax.
There are no quick wins in lifestyle change. Consistency IS the lifestyle change.
When you stay the course your change transforms from initial resistance, self judgement and criticism (why am I doing this??) into a stream of hope (yes! I can’t wait to do it again today).
One example is the initial resistance I felt to a consistent meditation and/or yoga practice. Some week’s I dragged my feet to yoga class. I tried to rationalize and negotiate with myself that I was too busy to do it, maybe later…not this week…
Everyone said, give it some time. Stick with it! It’s hard in the beginning. And it’s so true. In the beginning it’s new and uncomfortable. The mind wants to think about things other than a meditation mantra, the body wants to just lay down on the mat and not do ANOTHER sun salutation.
Then something magical happens.
I started to look forward to that early morning meditation, or that Wednesday night yoga class.
Week after week.
All of a sudden it became a consistent practice and I started to feel the anticipation, the positive feelings came on as soon as I envisioned myself being in at the yoga studio or on my meditation pillow.
I felt hopeful for what’s to come.
Because I felt better.
I started to prioritize my new practice, I made choices in my life to ensure I could maintain my practice. All of a sudden it was part of my daily routine.
It started to feel a natural, easy and part of me.
If you’re struggling to stay consistent with something you deeply know is good for you, but you chose to go do other things that feel more important than your own self care. You’re not alone.
Here are a few tips to get you more consistent with a morning routine and finally putting yourself first.
1.) Forgive yourself.
The frustration you feel about your own lack of self care is often bottled up from years of multitasking and making sure everything gets done. The first step to change is to forgive all of that.
2.) Drop the comparison.
Your needs for self care are completely different than someone else’s, and that’s many times overlooked. What makes you thrive is a unique combination of self care practices that feed your soul first, then your body, not the way around.
So by comparing yourself to others you chose to judge and miss the opportunity for self awareness, what you truly need to feel cared for by yourself.
3.) Examine how your current morning routine makes you feel.
Everyone has a morning routine already. Take a minute to think about what you do every day in the morning. Often it’s the same steps every morning. We all like routines, but they can either drain us or fill us up with energy.
4.) Create an inspiring morning routine.
So many times we lose interest because we’re not inspired anymore. No wonder things gets pushed out. A nourishing inspiring morning routine is like gold pouring into your soul.
Think about what you do every morning. Does it feel like your own special time, only for you?
Write down every step of your current morning routine. Review it and decide if you’re happy with how it makes you feel or not. Consider changing ONE little thing this week, but be sure to change it into something you truly feel inspired by.
Maybe it’s lighting your favorite candle and writing in your hand picked journal that gets you inspired because it represents all your dreams.
Maybe it’s the stillness you feel in your morning meditation while wrapped in a soft blanket.
Your special morning routine doesn’t have to be this long 1-2 hour routine to start with. Start with 10 minutes, very special minutes..still minutes..creative minutes…make it your very own self-time.
Non-negotiable time by you and others.
5) Celebrate your new life style everyday!
When you’re starting to notice that you’re looking forward to your next morning, consistency is natural. When you feel you can stay consistent with your morning routine, with ease and no matter what happens you have changed it into a new lifestyle.
This anticipation is turning into a celebration of you! Every morning you turn the attention to yourself and celebrate the gift of self care.
So if you feel your life is on autopilot, you feel passive and caught up in life’s complexity. Set the intention today to start putting yourself first.
How can you change one little thing about your current morning routine that would make your day start off in a different way?
What would motivate you to stay consistent with your self care?